Did I say I was going to start and finish writing a whole book this week?
Was I lying?
It’s true that I haven’t started writing the aforesaid promised book yet but, hey, it’s only Tuesday – I’ve still got a whole week left, before I return to my day job next Tuesday! I could still do it!
And does being a prolific blogger count? I have, after all, self-published numerous posts over the last few days. Surely there’s enough of a total word count here to qualify as a whole book?
Take this post about my childhood haunt of Newport, for example:
Or yesterday’s Getting Out of the ‘Kitchen’ 16: Evolution.
As you can see (and read), it’s not that I’ve exactly been lazy. I’ve done lots of writing and, thanks to Mrs Hinch, … lots of futile cleaning. Were the blog posts as futile as the cleaning? Is it really likely that an editor from some great publishing house will read my blog and turn up on my doorstep to offer me a million pound writing commission?
Is my one loyal follower, Ricardo Scribblero, not really a retired poet after all? Is he really a talent scout looking for the next J K Rowling?
Here I am, Ricardo! Here I am!
I’m getting out of the day job; now get me out of my kitchen!
Just take a look at this lot: my paintbrushes haven’t seen a canvas for some years; my hen’s doing a crap in my best ceramic pot; the sunflower’s dead; and yesterday’s vegetable steamer is still looking murky in the sink.
The sprog’s have left dirty crocks everywhere (okay, so maybe the wine glass is mine); and the Hubby’s emptied out the contents of the cupboards and removed all the plinths, in some kind of a failed attempt to sort out the plumbing.
And why have I got so many cookbooks, when everything I cook gets burnt to a cinder?
I can’t even make a start on getting everything back into order – the pipework under the sink is still leaking, as is the washing machine! So I can’t wash up (what a shame) and I can’t escape (it’s chucking it down cats and dogs outside). Guess I’ll just have to carry on blogging …
The book? Oh, okay – I’ll think about it. I might even make a start on that opening paragraph. Look out for my next update!
In the meantime, does anyone know of a reliable plumber (not my hubby), and where’s that Mrs Hinch?
Copyright of text and photos owned by Jay Cool, May 2019
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