Deblobbed: A Silly Poem

‘Captured During a Walk in Chilton’ by Jay Cool, 10th May, 2019

All roughed up inside a Marks and Spencer’s cardigan, I decide that its time.

Time for a clean-up.

I purchase a roll of sticky-tap that promises to be the best of all deblobblers.

And, I prepare myself – for the deblobbing.

I roll out the tape, determined to tough it out – to do away with the rough bits, to deblob

my covering … for ever.

I take hold of the ends and let rip.

But I’m not ready.

I’m not ready and the blobs know it.

They know it and are ready. Ready to kill.

Blobheads hold onto the tape, arms extending, stretching, winding their way over and

around me.

All wrapped up, enveloped in rolls and rolls of tape and tentacles, I know that this is it.

This is the tape that I’ve always feared.

The tape that you’ve always feared.

This is the tape that loses its end.

It’s smooth and it’s slick and

I’m already stuck tight

and right – in the

thick of



Copyright of text and photograph owned by Jay Cool, May 2019

Published by The Silly-Savvy Salopian

Freelance writer and descendant of the cave dweller and outlaw, Humphrey Kynaston. Banished from Shropshire for my eccentricity, I have made my home in Suffolk. I write poetry, short stories, travel journals, comedy gig reviews and non-fiction articles. My wish is to write my way back into the heart of my birth land. All writing commissions (and free holidays in Shropshire!) considered.

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