Joe Cool (1760-1833), Jay Cool’s Great-Great-Great Grandfather, from Myddle, Shropshire
I don’t recall having too many conversations with my Grandad, Arnold Cool, as I spent most of my time during family visits to Single Lane, taking a wide berth around his armchair, for fear of my leg being grabbed and my foot tickled.
I think Arnold thought that the sole purpose of a Grandaughter was to be a victim of torture, but I hated having my feet tickled, so much so that I brain-trained [1] myself not to be respond – with the phrase: I am not ticklish, I am not ticklish, I am not ticklish …. on repeat play. This did eventually work and was a long-term success as, to this day, I can honestly say that I am not the slightest bit ticklish.
But although one-to-one conversations with Grandad were few and far between, I do remember, with some clarity (due to the volume) his rants, mainly aimed at my mother,[2]about the idle youth of today (or more precisely now, the idle youth of the 1980s). During our stays at Single Lane, Albrighton, Grandad would descend his self-made-masterpiece-of-a-virtually-vertical staircase, having forced himself out of bed just before midday, and only just in time for his dinner – and proceed to hurl derogatory statements about his grandchildren around the sitting-room.
“What you all sitting around for doing nothing, you lazy good- for- nothings? Your Nan’s in the kitchen working hard, making sure you have food on your plates and what are you doing? When I was your age, I was out at work earning my keep. Scroungers – that’s what you are!
I’ll have you know that My Great- Great Grandfather got out of bed at five in the morning, walked nine miles to Shrewsbury, completed a whole day’s work shifting great big stones for Lord Hill’s Column (3), and then walked the nine miles back to his home in Myddle.
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And what are you lot doing? Nothing! Just lazing around being waited on ……”
My brother and I didn’t dare point out to Grandad the irony of his statement; he himself had only just got out of bed. My Nanna, Joan Cool (nee. Tossem), had been up at half-past five clearing out the hearth of yesterday’s ashes and re-laying it with coal and wood, with the last day barely completed.
(WATCH THIS SPACE – PIC OF A BRASS COMPANION SET COMING SHORTLY!)
I loved watching her sweep out the white ash with a brass handled brush, and arranging twisted rolls of newspaper in between fresh coals and logs to give the new day a heads up. But, I wasn’t so keen, on accompanying Nanna, in the freezing- cold-winter weather, on miserably-dark mornings, to fetch coal from the bunker, or logs from the wood store adjacent to the outhouse.
[1] Why modern-day Nintendo game designers have claimed the concept of ‘Brain Training’ for themselves and made lots of money out of it, has given me cause for major concern; in fact, I have considered suing them for copyright. I may, possibly put this idea to the next cold-caller who persuades me to pick up my phone and respond to their declaration that I have suffered from an incident for which I can claim for. (I will let you know their response!)
[2] Nothing much changes. Even today, parents-in-law, perpetually torment their daughters-in-law about their complete lack of parenting skills.
[3] If only my Great-Great-Great Grandfather, Joe Cool, had known that his Great-Great-Great Grandaughter was going to blog about his efforts, he would have thought that every little pang from his aching feet was a moment like none other, a moment to be inscribed into stone – a moment to be immortalised!
Copyright owned by Jay Cool, 2017
Images: The photo of Lord Hill’s Column was taken by Keith Havercroft, is Creative Commons Licensed, and is available at: http://www.geograph.org.uk/photo/130898. The ‘stone foot’ is a Creative Commons image from Pixabay.
The Silly-Savvy Salopian in Suffolk: read, believe and write ... 